The Coup D'Maman

I've been overthrown by a pair of 13 year old identical twin girls.  On Sundays we go to church and we are NEVER on time, (it's not my fault, it's my 6 kids' fault, and my husband who takes longer to get ready than I do!)  Well, apparently my twins had had enough.  This morning I was abruptly awakened at 7:45 (church starts at 9:00, so I generally try to sleep until 8:25).   My twin girls literally jumped on my bed and yelled, "It's time to get up, we're NOT going to be late to church this morning!"  I moaned like a California sea lion and told them (ok lied), I would get up...in a minute.

Ten minutes later they came in again, this time fully annoyed, and said, "I can't believe you're not up yet, we are leaving in twenty minutes."  I replied, "I can't believe you're so bossy!"  Apparently, today was the day they decided to take a page out of my own parenting book and feed it to me for breakfast without sugar on it or anything!  I crawled out of bed, cleared the sleep out of my eyes and proceeded to get ready. My daughter came up a third time, and said, "Oh good, you're up." Am I really that irresponsible that I need to be checked on three times to make sure I'm out of bed?   I mean, I have kept six kids alive up to this point, which should count for something! 

The New Dictators 

I walked downstairs and my daughter handed me a bowl of eggs with toast, "Here's your breakfast, Mom."  I looked around and all my kids were ready, including my Ethiopian kids whose hair has to be tamed by Siegfried & Roy (we have them flown in weekly for the taming).  Everyone was eating scrambled eggs with cheese (or breakfast burritos) and buttered and honeyed toast. I was sure this was the rapture and I had already been caught up in Heaven.  Awakened from my dream by the extreme quiet (like any mom with toddlers knows about), I realized that my kids were all in the car already.  

Screen shot of when we got to church

On the way to church, my daughters encouragingly added that we were going to get to church today at the time we normally leave the house.  Whatever (insert eye roll aimed at my girls)!  When we did arrive at church at 8:49, I drove around the parking lot pretending to look for a parking spot.  Really I was just trying not to be TOO early, I have a reputation to uphold and I was the only person under 65 in the parking lot!  My girls triumphantly skipped toward the front of the church while singing a song about being on time. So apparently, our roles have already reversed!  I thought I would be in adult diapers before they became responsible enough to care for me!  In truth it was the most peaceful drive and Sunday morning ever.  I wasn't yelling at my kids to get ready (they were yelling at me), I didn't have to make breakfast, wipe faces, tie shoes, fix hair, crate the dog, yell some more, get in the car, get back out of the car to get things and kids I forgot, and drive like a mad woman to church (we've already established my award winning driving skills).  I could get used to this new dictatorship! Also... it may be time to confess, that I may be the problem and reason we’re late (or...I could still blame my husband, he was sick in bed and stayed home today).